Accounting Inside The Church [A Story] – Season 2, Part 3

I was awoken with a kiss on my lips by Iyoaye
and I saw her dangling the envelope.

Iyoaye: ife mi, where did you see $12,500?
I sprung up and checked the envelope. Truly it
was $12,500 in there and honestly, I was
scared; but I quickly came up with an idea.
Me: ah!!!! The Head Pastor told me to keep it
for him. He gave me late last night as I was
leaving the office.

Iyoaye: why can’t you keep it in the safe in the
church? Iwo okunrin yii maa pami (you this
man, don’t put me into trouble).
Me: (hugging her) don’t worry dear. Nothing
will happen.

As I hugged her I perceived the odour of s*x
coming from her cloth. I asked her
Me: how was the programme?
Iyoaye: it was fine.
Me: really fine
Iyoaye: yes. Oko mi I am very tired. I want to
As she was going inside the room, I pulled her
Me: ife, can you do me a favour?
Iyoaye: what is it?
Me: don’t tell anyone that you saw this money.
Iyoaye: ok dear. But is it why u called me back?
Instead of answering her I squeezed her
Weapon of Mass Defence. But as I touched it, I
felt some sticky on it. I pretended not to have
felt anything. I allowed her in to sleep and I
smelled my hands. After some minutes, I
sneaked into the room and inserted my finger
into her holiest. When I withdrew my hands
from it guess what I saw………
After some hours she woke up and came into
the sitting room.
Iyoaye: my husband, why did you leave me
alone in the room
Me fuming) where the h3ll did you went to?
Iyoaye: what is the meaning of this question I
told you I went for the programme I discussed
with you.
I showed her the used CD I saw in her bag and
as soon as she saw it, she burst into the tears
and kneeling down in front of me

Iyoaye: please forgive me…….. the man has
been pressuring me to sleep with me. Even he
gave me an ultimatum that if I don’t sleep with
him he will terminate the business deals I had
with him.
(flashback) Chief Ladapo is a business man that
walked into our shop one day to clear all the
goods in our shop. Afterwards, he became our
financier, but little did I know that I was paying
back with my wife……..
Me: leave me alone for now. Just leave me

I took my phones and left the house. I tried
calling Dcns Emeka but her number wasn’t
reachable. I called Jide so that we could hang
Jide: Accountant the Accountant how far?
Me: gbege don happen. You dey for that our
usual point?
Jide: na wa o. my first lady dey around. Na
bleeping things sure pass
Me: make I Whatsapp you.
Jide: ok padi mi.
I chatted with him and told him what
happened. As soon as he got the message he
called back
Jide: Collins, kini mo ri yii (what is this I saw
) how did it happen?
Me: I am as clueless as Uncle Jona
Jide: lets meet at our usual spot with immediate
Me: alrite boss
We met some minutes later
Jide: Collins….o ga o. how didn’t you know what
was going on?
Me: JIDE if I tell you that I know what is going
on, I will be lying to you.

I narrated the whole event to him and
afterwards we discussed and parted for the
night. As soon as we got home I saw my wife
already packed her bags about to leave.
Me: what is this? (pointing at the bags)
Iyoaye: (kneeling and crying) my husband,
please forgive me I am sorry
Me: do you think I will chase you out from the
house? Well for your information, you are not
going anywhere (her face lit up) BUT we will not
be sleeping together.

Iyoaye: (holding on to my trousers) thank you.
(she burst into fresh tears)
I was remorse because I too was at the guest
house bleeping Dcns. Emeka that night but I
played hard so that my wife would not know.