Ladies Only: 12 Signs Your Boyfriend Is A Women ‘Collector’

Most people like to have a collection of various things: First-Edition books, comic books, coins, stamps, postcards, bobbleheads… and the list goes on.

In the same way, some guys like to have a collection of different women to either soothe their ego or just because they can.

Is your man a ‘women collector’? Check these 12 signs below to find out:

  1. He likes to be in control: Think about the collectors you see in movies and in television. They’re careful, methodical, protective. A collector only shows you as much of himself as he can bear. If you have a date where he gets more open or vulnerable than usual and you think you’re making progress, beware: he’s about to pull away for a while.

  2. He comes on strong: The collector pursues. He flirts, he woos, he seduces. You are the special edition/mint-condition/one-of-a-kind object he’s been waiting to find. You will feel irresistible, appreciated and wanted. It’s a heady drug and hard to say no to. But this guy… he is also full of tricks and surprises.

  3. He’s amazing when it’s brand-new: Once you’ve started things with a date/kiss/sex, he seems to be all yours. His attention is fully on you because, of course, you are the newest part of his collection. Beware, though, it won’t be long before his fancy’s struck by another potential addition.

  4. He pulls back if you don’t seem into it: He’s courting you and you’re perhaps a little hesitant? Just like if he was bartering over a rare item, the collector’s trick is always to walk away but just far enough to hear you say, “Well, wait a second, we might be able to make a deal…”

  5. He adores you when you’re together: Of course he does. He’s opened his case and taken you out to enjoy. You will be fawned over, tended to, and, even polished. He’s perfect in your presence and you want to be all his. But once he’s made sure you’re still in working order, it’s back in the case with you.

  6. He thinks of you as a set of adjectives: You might be the sexy, brainy, witty one. Then there’s the carefree, athletic, competitive one. Collectors really get to know you at the beginning and take a real-seeming interest in your life. But he’s just paying close attention to his newest find. He never goes much deeper than that at those early stages, though, because he wants to catalog you as simply as possible.

  7. He likes you when you’re not messy: Collectors keep things under glass, in packages, and wrapped in plastic. They like when you’re fascinating but not too complicated. The second you have a real problem or express a real need, you’re spoiled in their eyes.

  8. He cancels plans: Collectors flake because they like the opportunity to spend time with all their collectibles. If he breaks dates or doesn’t make plans, that’s why. Don’t buy other excuses.

  9. He will reappear if you disappear: Say you’ve had it and you start to pull away. You will probably hear from the collector just as soon as you think you’re over it. (They’ve got the magic that way.) It will be a short, sweet, low-effort communication but just enough to make you think they want to keep you around. And they do. Just not that much.

  10. He never really ends things: If you’re not on his “crazy” list, he won’t really cut himself out of your life. No, you won’t hear from him with regularity. No, things won’t necessarily progress to a deeper level but he will always let you believe that he might someday want a real relationship.

  11. He gives you the sense he’s said these things before: It’s hard work, this collecting. Sometimes, the collector will say things so smooth and so charming that seem almost rehearsed. In a way, they are.

  12. He likes you better when you’re subject to other admiration: We all want a partner we can be proud of. But collectors want the thing that other people want. If you’re out with him and he catches others looking at you, he will place more worth on you and you’ll feel beyond adored — but for that night only.

Leave a Reply